Whether you are a full time mom, a business owner or working for someone else, you are probably trying to divide your time and attention between work, yourself, and the people you care about. Work-life balance means different things to different people. Is it coming home after a long day leaving work stuff behind? Or if you work from home, is it actually leaving the house for some nurturing activities?

I usually go to the gym three times a week. When I exercise, I feel healthier, more energized and free from the “clutter” in my head. This week, I gave 3 presentations to different groups of women. With the time it took to prepare for the presentations, it was a packed week. I skipped my second exercise da and then almost skipped my third exercise day. It was hard to decide if I should skip it to catch up on work, or go anyway.

One of the women in my presentation this week shared that she works too much and rests too little “but I don’t have a choice”, she said. “I have to work so much and I have no time to rest”. There is nothing I can do about it. It’s work.

I remembered her when trying to make up my mind about the gym.

Really? Do we not have a choice?

We do! We are in charge of our choices and decisions. Our brain tells us that we’re not… that working so much is a fact, not something that could be changed. But it’s not a fact. It’s our choice, even if it doesn’t feel like it. We have a lot more control over our lives than we think.

I ended up going to the gym. I was so energized and motivated when I came back that it actually took me less time to get things done. Writing my blog was easy since creativity and inspiration were simply flowing. I know that clearing my head while exercising was the key.

For me, exercising is important in order to keep work-life balance.

Of course there are other important factors as well: setting boundaries with how late I work, allowing myself to take breaks, to rest, to do something fun, to socialize and to feel that there is more to life than work.

Here are my Top 7 Work-Life Balance Tips:

1. Create blocks of time for work, family and self. If both you and your partner are working, have a conversation and coordinate “together time”, “alone time” and “work time”.  Sometimes it is just a matter of having a conversation and making plans, but most people are have more success by writing it in their calendars.

2. Protect your “non-work” time. During your family or alone time, don’t work! It is better to spend only an hour with your kids, but to be fully present to them, no phone, no emails, than to spend several distracted hours with them. Same goes for your alone time. Taking a walk by yourself or with a pet? How about enjoying the moment and leaving the phone at home?

3. Do one thing at a time. The result of doing a million things at the same time is stress, low productivity, over-exhaustion and burnout. If there are more than 3 documents open on your computer screen, that’s a red flag. Work on one task at a time and when you’re done move to the next one. If you are a full time mom and you also have your own business, wear your “mom’s hat” for a block of time, and concentrate fully on your responsibility as a mother. This way, you won’t feel guilty when you switch to your “career hat” and devote yourself to that. Trying to do both at once creates unnecessary tension.

4. Identify and cut your time wasters. Once you’re clear with your priorities and your blocks of time, you have to make sure you don’t fill it up with activities that are time consuming and unproductive. I’m not talking about fun activities, because those are important, but I am talking about activities you get addicted to and spend too much time on without much reward Examples are: computer games, facebook, watching TV for a long time, etc.

5. Make dates with your kids. If you have children, plan individual time to spend with each one of them, undistracted. Whether it’s a walk in nature, picnic in the park or baking together, this quality time will means so much both for them and for you.

6. Make dates with your partner. If you are married on in a relationship, the best way to make your relationships a priority when you are busy with work is to plan at least one evening a week where you’re both devoted to being with one another. Don’t expect your partner to initiate it. Do it yourself. Show them that they are important for you and your time together is valuable, no matter how busy you are.

7. Make dates with yourself. When we talk about work-life balance, alone time is the first thing most people give up. The irony is that when you spend time with yourself it energizes you, makes you centered and creates a sense of inner peace. You really need it in order to live a balanced. It doesn’t happen by itself. Plan ahead and schedule time in your calendar.

To support you, we have created a FREE “Improving Your Work-Life Balance” Guide. First you will evaluate areas that need improvement and then you’ll prioritize and take steps to improve.

Download the free guide by clicking on this link

“Improving Your Work-Life Balance” Free Guide

Please share with us which of my 7 tips was your favorite.

One morning this week, I got a little frustrated with my dog. She had been eating dirt outside in the yard and got sick. Although we have a fenced yard, we decided to supervise her when she’s out so she stops this new habit. It was a cold and foggy morning… too early for going outside when my bed is so warm and cozy. As I step outside to the yard, leaning my head down thinking to myself “why do I deserve this” something made me raise my head and look around me. I was completely shocked to notice how beautiful was the view, when the trees are waking up, the fog is starting to thin and the universe is presenting itself refreshed and anew. I didn’t want the moment to end. My heart was filled with gratitude. I felt so supported by powerful nature. The picture I took on my phone is just a reminder. Believe me, it was much more beautiful.

Thanks to my dog and her annoying habit, I had the honor of feeling the gift of the moment.

Later that day, I had a coaching session with Patricia, one of my clients who said to me: “I realize that we go through the day without looking. We forget to accept and appreciate. We forget to notice the sky, the clouds, and the beauty. When your eyes open, you heart opens up and life is lighter.”

Synchronicity.

The same message twice in one day.

Bottom line: Raise your head, look around you and appreciate the gifts of the moment.

Ask: What am I grateful for and what do I appreciate in life?

Affirm: I raise my head, I look around me and I appreciate the gifts of the moment.

Why having a vision is important

Gandhi’s visualization of having a free India became a reality years after it started as a simple picture in his own mind.

Martin Luther King’s “I have a dream” speech was his own vision that has been manifesting as reality (not fully, but we’re on the way).

1988 Olympics’ participant Ruben Gonzales describes his months and years of training for his first Olympics: “Whether I was jogging, lifting weight, eating dinner, or simply walking in the mall, in my mind I was walking into the opening ceremonies at the Olympics, the crowd was cheering wildly; to the right I could see the Olympic flag waving… and 4 years later, when I actually walked out into the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, it was exactly the way I imagined it – only a hundred times better.”

Creating a vision means making a mental picture of something you want to become true. Visual images have a huge impact on your brain. One of the most exciting scientific breakthroughs of the past decades has been the discovery that we are constantly making new brain cells and brain cell connections. When you create images of your vision, you train your subconscious mind to create a reality from your vision.

If the picture of your future is vague – that will also be your reality.

Make it clear – and you are half way to the future you want.

So what’s the first step?

The first step is creating your vision. You can do it in any of the following way:

• Writing – Think about your life a year from now, as if there are no limitations and the sky is the limit – and write down  every details you can about your life
• Reading – read inspirational stories of people who made their dream into a reality and ask yourself how you can apply their stories to your own
• Talking – Put it out there, tell people what’s your intention and vision
• Visualization – Close your eyes, imagine your life a year from now, as if there are no limitations and the sky is the limit. Make it alive. Believe in it.

So let’s say I know what I want. What’s the most effective way to manifest my vision?

The most effective way it to manifest vision is to get into action mode and do one or all of the following (depending on your personality & learning style):

• Meditate on your vision daily
• Create affirmations of your vision and practice them
• Break down your vision into goals and set up an action plan
• Make a spread sheet of small actions you want to take
• Get professional support or an accountability buddy
• If you came up with goals and actions, give them a deadline and schedule it in your calendar
• Make your own Vision Board, look at the board every day and ask yourself: what’s a small step I can take today to make this vision a reality?

But I have tried it so many times before…

That’s why I’m here!

I have been there myself, making New Year’s resolutions and fining old dusty vision boards in my basement…

Not anymore!

What changed?

My thinking.

I have learned to change my beliefs and thoughts, to retrain my brain so I believe 100% in my vision. I got a professional to help me close the gap between my vision and my reality. Otherwise, I wouldn’t live the passionate life I live right now, I wouldn’t have the successful business I have right now, the house of my dream, the relationships I want and… the list is long. It’s not perfect, but it is so much better than I ever imagined. I’m so excited to create my next vision and turn it into a reality. We always learn and grow…

Life is Good!

Yours can be too!

Email me to schedule your free 15-minute “reality check” coaching session. Would love to help you!

We judge others, we judge ourselves.

When we judge and criticize others, we get angry and disappointed with them. When we judge and criticize ourselves, we feel guilty and ashamed.

Often, we blame others for something we struggle with ourselves. For instance, when you are all motivated to exercise and eat healthy you might judge someone who isn’t. You forget that just a few weeks ago, you were struggling just like them. You judge your friend for being too controlling or trying to fix their children or partner. Wasn’t it just last night when you were in somebody’s face trying to tell them how they should be?

When it comes to ourselves, we tend to forget our attributes, successes, achievements and to focus on what we haven’t done, what we could have done better. We judge and criticize ourselves and the result is that we beat ourselves up.

We are out of balance.

What can we do?

Evaluate objectively – instead of judging and criticizing.

It is not going to change the facts but it is defiantly going to change your reaction.

If you step back, get into an observer mode and evaluate the situation (yours or others) objectively, you will not lose your power over what happened. Instead, you will manage your emotions, cope with whatever happened in a balanced way and move forward with your life.

The Bottom line: Judging and criticizing create and spread negativity. Step back, observe and evaluate.

Ask: What might be a reason I (or they) behave like that and how can I be compassionate?

Affirm: I let go of judging and criticizing, I evaluate objectively and I’m free.

You also expect a lot from yourself. Especially if you are an over achiever, like many of us are, you get caught in this “marathon” feeling of moving forward, pushing harder, having more success, producing more. Before you know it, your expectations from yourself are as high as the sky and you end up being disappointed.

Chances are that if you have a tendency to expect the impossible from yourself, you also do it with your partner, your friends, your co-workers and the whole world. You keep being disappointed and frustrated and your life is out of balance.

So how do you regain balance?

You pause and check: is this realistic? How can I phrase it (both in your head and when you’re communicating with others) in a more supportive way? How can I leave a window open to let others be who they are and find their own way?

After you re-set your expectations, make sure you communicate them clearly.

Remember that other people cannot read your mind. (at least most of them…)

While writing this post, I realized that many of my expectations from myself were completely unrealistic for today. My plan was to fit in 3 hours stuff that should take at least 6 hours.  Thank you, my dear readers, for being both my students and my teacher…

What do you expect from yourself and others which is unrealistic and how willing are you to change it?

In this new series, “52 Balance Tips”, I am going to share with you simple ways to create balance in your life. Everything I’ll share with you has been proven successful and has brought balance to people’s life. But here is the key: you have to make it your own. You have to actually do it. Reading is not enough. Get engaged in the process: take notes, journal, adjust it so it fits your needs, share with others, ask me questions and most importantly, make it fun.

Are you excited? I am too. So let’s start.

My first tip is – start a new chapter, and write it yourself.

Imagine that you could leave your past behind. That you could stop labeling the past as “good” or “bad”, trusting that any past experiences that might benefit you now are already part of your being, part of your “wisdom data”. Imagine yourself writing a book. The book of your life. You are done writing a chapter; your turn the page over and you start a new one. You are writing your book. It is your own creation, so you can create whatever you want. You don’t expect others to write your new chapter for you. You don’t blame life for forcing you to write the new chapter. You enjoy the freedom of writing it yourself.

Your Balance Action:
Start your day with turning the page and starting a new chapter.
Close your eyes take a deep breath and ask yourself “what would I write in my new chapter today”?
Pick up your journal, write “Today’s Chapter” and write down how you’re taking charge of the day, and writing your own book.

Inspire me and others: what did you write? Share with us.

The New Year “buzz” is already here, but before I get into the excitement and promises of the New Year, I took some time this week to reflect. Every morning I wrote 3 pages in my journal, allowing all the “stuff” to come up with no special structure. What a rolle rcoaster this year has been! And although I enjoyed the ride, there were up moments and down moments.

On a personal level, my daughter who is 18 left home and moved away. My son, who is 22, came back home after graduating from college. Big adjustment for all of us. One of the hardest lessons for parents. We moved to a new house. My dad’s Alzheimer got worst. Lots of transitions and change which brought up some joy as well as fear, sadness and doubt. My family needed a lot of my attention this year. I had to switch between the “mom hat” and the “daughter hat” often, while seeking balance between my personal and professional life. Looking back, 3 things kept me going and growing:

1. Being willing to get honest about what’s really going on in my head & heart, what thoughts, beliefs and emotions drive me and having the courage to take control over them.
2. Asking for support – I have worked with a coach, joined a support group, shared with my husband and with friends, and got centered every morning for a spiritual support as well. I have learned to ask for support and to accept support.
3. Living my passion and doing service for others was a big one for me this year. My natural tendency is to put life on hold when something is going on either with my dad or with my children. So many of you kept holding a mirror in front of my face, reminding me to take care of myself no matter what is going on around me.

You, my dear students, clients and friends, provided me with the opportunity to care from my heart, to serve you from a place of passion, and for that, I am so grateful to you all. One of my clients, Colleen, ended her email recently with “I wish you all the best in your practice! You are changing lives, Michal! Keep it up!” Just a few words but what an amazing encouragement. Doing something I love and watching how it changes your lives for the better keeps me going.

So what does it all have to do with you?

I invite you to learn from my experience and make a change in your life.

Get honest and be willing to change your thoughts and beliefs. Ask for support. Share from your heart. Live your passion and allow others to hold a mirror in front of your face.

Let me help you, just like I allowed others to help me.

The new programs I developed for 2012 come from a lifetime as a balance seeker and all the lessons I have learned from you. Although this is still a business and I try to sell and promote these programs, they are a pure reflection of my journey and truly bring balance and joy to people’s lives. They bring results.

So don’t stop reading here. Spend a few minutes and check out the opportunities for growth I’m offering in 2012:

• Watch this result-driven video and take the Balance-Index Assessment. Taking this assessment myself was the beginning of my new life. It can happen to you too.
• If you are a woman in any stage of Empty Nest, join me and Dr. Anne Namnoum for the first meeting of the Atlanta “Empty Nest, Full Life” community on January 19th. If you can’t join us but would like to be part of our community, please email me.
• If you live in the Atlanta area, join me this coming Thursday, 1/5/2012 for my inspiring talk “Overstressed or balanced? The Choice is truly Yours!” at the Life Dance Wellness Center in Covington, Georgia.
• Get on my VIP List and be the first to get the information about my newest “Stop Being Overwhelmed with Responsibilities and start feeling Happy and Fulfilled” online program which starts on January 23rd. (You can do it from anywhere).The details of this program are still a secret, but if you email me and get on my VIP list you will be first to get the information. I expect a huge turn-out to this program and space is limited. Email me now.

Again – I am here to help you.
I have learned so much from you and from my personal journey and I have used all my experience, creativity and talent to develop these programs.

Thank you for being part of my ride in 2011 and let’s have an amazing ride together in 2012.

Cheers!

Michal

P.S. Make a difference in somebody else’s life and forward this to them.

Why reflect?

• It helps you to keep things in proportion, especially if you tend to get caught in the story or the drama of life. When we step back and observe our lives objectively from a distance, it is easier to see the facts and release the emotional attachments.
• Instead of repeating our mistakes, we can learn from them and make changes. When you reflect on the past, you become clear what you can do differently in the future.
• Accessing your wisdom and creativity by reflecting on the past year, you end up coming up with new insights and new ideas.
• The end of the year is the perfect time to celebrate your achievements, successes and accomplishments. Reflecting helps you remember them.

What to reflect on?

You want to reflect but you don’t know where to start. That’s very normal. Break it down and reflect on each on of the following areas:

• Career/Profession
• Family/Parenting
• Personal Development
• Spiritual Awareness
• Fun & Enjoyment
• Intimate Relationships/Social Relationships
• Health/Aging
• Personal Finance

How to reflect?

Choose your favorite Reflection Method – or have fun trying them all.

Morning Pages
Every morning for a week or two, write in your journal three pages titled: “2011”. Write anything that comes up: positive memories, negative ones, funny stuff, events, and people you have met and liked, people you don’t like, things that makes you laugh, things that makes you cry. Can’t think of anything? Write: “I don’t know what to write about 2011” and go from there. Just write whatever comes up, without censoring yourself. 3 pages. Every day. You’ll be surprised how much “good stuff” will come up to the surface.

Gratitude List
Every evening, write a list of “Things I’m grateful for in 2011”. Don’t over think it. Write down whatever comes up even if it doesn’t make sense.

End of Year Reflection Questions
Read each one of the following questions. Connect to your heart, take a moment get centered, and write down the answer.

1. What made me happy this year?
2. What made me disappointed?
3. Where was I successful?
4. What were my top three challenges/lessons?
5. Which challenge was my biggest gift and why?
6. How did I grow & improve, compared to the previous year?
7. Who is the person I have learned the most from?
8. For what am I grateful?
9. What if the funniest memory from this year?
10. On a scale of 1-10 (1 being “I wish it were different” 10 being “SO satisfied”), how satisfied I am in each of these areas:
• Career/Profession
• Family/parenting
• Personal Development
• Spiritual Awareness
• Fun & Enjoyment
• Intimate Relationships/Social Relationships
• Health/Aging
• Personal Finance

In order to embrace the new, we must release the old.

An important part of preparing for the New Year is to review the past year.

Have fun with the process and please write in the comment area and share the most surprising fact that came up for you.

Happy Reflection!

When you interpret something, you create an opinion about an event, situation, or experience. In essence, you create an explanation and then look for evidence to support its validity.  When you make an interpretation, you don’t even see that other explanations exist. In actuality, though, an interpretation often represents only one viewpoint among the many that are possible.

Your interpretations hold a strong energetic charge, which affects your emotions and actions. If you believe your viewpoint of a particular situation is the only explanation, you might not be aware of another point of view. You may end up wasting a lot of time and resources marching off in the wrong direction. Because you don’t see that other possibilities exist, you remain stuck in your story, and feel like you have no control over the outcome.

Interpretations are personal and are somewhat difficult to let go of and challenge. Holding onto them may seem like the easy way out, as facing them may move you into uncharted territory. However, challenging your interpretations opens you up to a world of possibilities, literally.

Typical interpretations may sound like this:

He doesn’t like me.

She thinks I’m incompetent.

They don’t want to follow orders.

My son is just not interested in doing his homework.

Interpretations can be directly challenged by asking: “What’s another way to look at that?” Just realizing that there are other ways to look at something lessens the power of your interpretation.  One way to do this is to imagine what another individual’s perspective of the situation might be. Asking for someone else’s point of view on a difficult situation (even if they are not directly involved) can break existing paradigms and open pathways for more successful solutions. Challenging yourself or others to argue the point of view directly opposite your interpretation also works remarkably well to arrive at new information, new angles, and new paths to success.

In the example of your spouse above, perhaps the reason why he barely acknowledged you was that he just received a disturbing phone call work related, or he had a deadline that had to be met – or…….well, there are many possible explanations.  What an opportunity you’d miss if you decided not to present your great idea based on your false interpretation.

This month, before you “jump to conclusions” and believe the first story that comes to mind, consider other possibilities that could lead you to new, empowering choices and actions.

Please share: what are some interpretations you make ?

If you have the perfect relationship with your parents, a beautiful bond with your in-laws, if you enjoy every moment you spend with your extended family around the holiday-season – this blog is not for you. Actually if that’s you, please skip to the comment area at the bottom and share your secret with us.

Since you’re still reading, chances are that you, like many other people, experience some tension and discomfort during all the time spent with family members during this time.

Here are the best tips I could gather from my clients’ experiences throughout the years:

1. Use “I” statements instead of “You” statements.

Let’s say that your mother-in-law gets a great sense of satisfaction from cutting you off every time you open your mouth to say something, especially if you look mad when she pushes your buttons.

Communicate your message clearly, using one “I” sentence (“I would love to tell my story without interruptions”). Don’t point a finger or say “You always stop me when I say something!” Using the “I” statement will give you back the power that you might have lost to her.

2. Use facts instead of judgments.

We always have history with our family. You might have a tendency to makes assumptions based on previous experiences (and traumas) and you might be invested emotionally in the situation.

Detach!

Stick to the facts!

Instead of thinking “who does she think she is, telling me that my kids have to go to bed earlier” think: “That’s what she says. Maybe she’s right, maybe she’s wrong. Let me think about the facts. I have the freedom to accept what she says, or not.”

3. Control your attitude.

Remember: you cannot control other people’s attitude but you can control your own. Ask yourself: if she was my best friend (and not my aunt), how would I be loving and kind towards her? Be kind and loving. Forgive. Have a positive attitude. Not because she is nice to you, but because you don’t want to give her so much power and to let her ruin your holiday. Be what you want to attract towards yourself. You want love and kindness? Be loving and kind.

4. Take time for yourself NO MATTER WHAT.

Even if your house is full of people and you feel responsible for entertaining them, you have to set your boundaries and create time for self care.

5. Do what you WANT and not what you’re EXPECTED to do (At least once a day ).

6. Play the following game with yourself: for each family member, ask yourself the question – what is she/he here to teach me?

What’s her/his gift? All relationships allow us to learn more about who we are. If we look at others as gifts being offered to us, we might choose to see them as partners on our journey.

My final tip is: sing the song “I will survive”, have lots of smiles and laughs. You need your sense of humor!

What’s your favorite tip? Please share!

Barbara connects with the audience in a very heart-centered, personal, fun (and funny) way. She looks so comfortable and at ease when she plays the piano, sings her songs and tells her story. It felt to me like she was born to sing and to speak but she shared how she always struggled with it and how she has transitioned from a place of chronic vocal problems and insecurity to a place of conducting leaderships workshops, producing 6 CDs and passionately sharing her voice with the world. She helps many people to transform and heal their lives by finding their voice. To her, “finding a new voice means stepping outside of who you think you are, to expand your identity to include parts of yourself you may have left behind.”

I left her presentation full of joy and uplifted, and it only increased when I got to my car and put on her CD,  “YES”. I was touched so deeply by her music, by her words and by her voice. I’m still addicted to this CD, and I asked her for permission to share my favorite song with you.

Before I let you listen to this powerful song, I would like to share with you something Barbara told me  on the phone today. This song “landed in her hand” one day when she was taking a nap. The first verse emerged while she was napping and the next two verses came in a dream the next night. When you watch the video, you can see her rowing in a transparent canoe over the Mississippi River in her native city – Minneapolis.

Thank you, Barbara, for making a difference in the world.

Here is Barbara’s YES video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqexOh9I4Z0

Every once in a while I have to remind myself that superheroes exist only in the movies, but in real life you are paying a huge price for trying to be one.

I used to suffer from the “Superwoman Syndrome”, and I still do sometimes.

• Do you ever push yourself too much?
• Are you the “Master of Multitasking”?
• Do you feel that you can do everything and that you should always be the best wife, mother, daughter, friend and professional?

If you answered yes to these questions, you might suffer from the “Superwoman Syndrome”.

The topic itself was first presented in 1984 by Marjorie Hansen Shaevitz. Her book The Superwoman Syndrome (for women trying to do it all—how to decide what’s important in your life and do it well), made headlines and increased awareness of the high cost to one’s life of this syndrome. It gave superwoman a label for their exhaustion but whether they used it as a drive to take personal control of their run-away lives is really up to them.

I am grateful for having enough tools in my “toolbox” to use when I feel that I am moving towards my old “Superwoman Syndrome”.

I would love to share my tools with you.

Join me tomorrow, Monday 11/28/2011 or Tuesday 11/29/2011

for my FREE “TIME FOR BALANCE” call.

During the call, I will show you how to take off the superwoman mask and become happier and healthier.

Register here: http://www.balancedmoments.com/time-for-balance/

If you have any insight about this topic, please share in the comment area and help other women!

The holiday season excitements: lots of shopping catalogs in the mail, holiday coupons, phone calls from family members. At the same time, people have their moments of frustrations: working hard to prepare, to make the house ready, so many things to do, don’t want to spend so much money again, do I really want to celebrate the holiday with “them” or do I have to?

In a few weeks, your stress level might be at its peak and then it will be harder to stop and take action to distress.

That’s why I want you to take your first step today.

In the next couple of weeks I am going to share with you my “break through your holiday season stress” method, but I am going to break it into small achievable steps. Why? Because I don’t want you to get overwhelmed. Especially if the holidays have taken an emotional toll on you in the past.

Here is my promise to you:
If you do your part, starting today – you will approach the holidays in a way that’s more centered and balanced than ever before.

Based on my experience working with people through the holidays in previous years, here are the most common goals:

• To feel balanced and centered entering the holidays
• To have a set of tools to distress if necessary
• To communicate effectively with family members
• To have a realistic budget and to stay within it
• To feel energized and positive
• To find time for self-care

Some of these goals might be yours too or you might have different ones. That’s why I want you to personalize it and get to the bottom of this season’s stressors for you.

So click here to receive your Breaking through your Holiday-Season Stress Action Guide.

It’s a word document – not a PDF, so you can save it on your computer, make any changes you want, save it again and email it to me so I can give you feedback and support.

Your life will not change by listening or reading. Your life will change by taking action.
Take action now. It is FREE, it is fun and I will support you every step of the way.

Click here. Be proactive and prepare to break through your holiday season stress

Happy Holidays!

Have I become less busy?

Did I find the magic cure for “I have so many things to do”?

Unfortunately, the answer is no.

But it became very clear to me, that I always have a choice, even when it feels like I don’t.

My business is more demanding than ever before. I am a lot busier, but I know that there are a few things I should always choose to do, no matter how busy I am. Before I tell you what they are I want to make sure you understand that these are the things that keep ME balanced. It doesn’t mean that same things will keep YOU balanced

Even when things are tough, I always:

1. Eat Healthy

I was heavy and unhealthy most of my life. Swinging between loosing and gaining weight, I finally found a program that worked for me. Almost 7 years ago, I lost 90 pounds and I maintain the weight since then. I plan ahead; I cook in advance, always make sure I have “emergency healthy food” in my freezer and I spend a few hours a week working a program of recovery from food addiction. Is there a room for improvement? Of course! I try to eat mindfully, sitting at the table and not doing anything else while eating. I still have meals that I eat next to the computer or while reading an article to get inspired for my blog… I would like to improve that and always eat mindfully because not only that the food tastes so good but I’m more satisfied and I also enjoy and relax at the same time.

2. Exercise.

I exercise 3 times a week. If I have an extremely busy week I exercise only twice. I love walking in nature but it is not enough for me. I integrate walking with exercising at the gym. When I sweat doing aerobics , when my heart rate rises, it clears my head. Many of my more inspiring ideas were born on the treadmill. There is something about the movement and the sweat that automatically releases tension for me (physical tension as well as emotional one). I do not use my iPhone to listen to music while training so I don’t get tempted to check emails. I use an iPOD that has only music, and some teleclass recording. Exercise is a great way for me to balance body and mind.

3. Get centered

I get centered no matter what is going on in my life. Getting centered means different things to different people. What does it mean for you? It might be yoga or meditation, walking in nature or inspirational reading. Whatever it is – if you do it daily, it changes the way you react to life. I get centered a few times a day: 20-minute meditation and self-Reiki early in the morning, 20-minute guided visualization nap some days in the afternoon and gratitude centering before bed. Throughout the day I remind myself to breath and I use affirmations when something feels off.

4. Do things I love

Many of you know how passionate I am about my work. I truly wake up excited to start my day every morning. Being a life-coach is not what I do, it is who I am. Very easily I get carried away to over work and do more than I want. I have to be very conscious about my choices. I don’t want to feel like it’s all about work and nothing else. Eventually it will drain me. That’s why I remember to do other things I enjoy. This is an important balance factor in my life. And I’m really talking about simple things:  listen to music rather than a recorded teleclass, watching a movie in the theatre so I can “turn off” my thoughts, taking evening walks with my husband and our dog, going out with my husband at least once a week, watching plays, meeting friends for tea (I stay away from coffee). It’s those small enjoyable moments that make all the difference.

Is it perfect? No. Some weeks are better than others. Some days are better than others. These 4 areas are at the top of my priority list. They are very important for me. And of course there are other balance actions that I take when I choose: getting a massage, going away, reading a fun book, resting, taking a workshop and many more fun activities.

It ‘s all about having less stress and more balance.

What are your non-negotiable balance actions? Please share!

“We cling to our own point of view, as though everything depended on it. Yet our opinions have no permanence; like autumn and winter, they gradually pass away”.

Every autumn, nature puts on a brilliant show of color in many parts of the United States. From dark greens, yellows and reds, different shadows of brown, the leaves transform, showing their rich and vibrant hues. Depending of where you are on the globe, fall brings different memories and feelings.

What is fall for you?

Is it a time for reflection and going within?

Or maybe the colors make you so vibrant and open-hearted that you want to spend most of your time outside and share your joy?

Many people become sentimental in October, and family gathering and memories come up as the holidays approach. As we feel the change of season, we might miss our relatives that have passed and are no longer here to celebrate the holidays with us. We might have memories which connect us to love and gratitude and makes us smile.

As the season alters your mood, being present is a little “Autumn Gift” you can give to yourself to help experience inner peace and a feeling of being centered and connected.

Here are 6 Mindfulness Rituals for Autumn:

Walk slowly. Take breaks throughout the day, even for few minutes and walk slowly while looking at the trees. Pay attention to the colors, allow yourself to stop and enjoy the change of season. Stand in your backyard for 5 minutes, mindfully looking around.

Drink your tea slowly. As the weather changes and it is less warm outside, treat yoruself with some new teas, different flavors, different types and drink at least one cup of tea every day, Drink mindfully, noticing how the cup feels in your hand and paying attention to how it makes you feel, without doing anything else at the same time. Just you and the tea.

Look at someone gratefully. Each day, find someone you care about. Instead of just seeing what you always see, really look at the person. (Try not to be creepy!) See this person for the miracle that they are, and be grateful for their existence. If you’re feeling generous, tell that person how thankful you are for them.

Stare at a tree (or even at a picture of an autumn tree) or the leaves on the ground, for 5 minutes each day. Just sit in silence. Become aware of your thoughts. Focus on your breathing. Notice the world around you. Ask yourself in what ways does this tree represent you?

Get centered by raking your leaves. Raking the leaves doesn’t have to be a forced job on your to-do-list. See it as an opportunity to use a repetitive motion, with a consistent sound supported by the beauty of the colors, as an act of centering. Be in the moment and allow your head to be clear of worries and concerns and to simply rake the leaves. It will relax you automatically.

Start each day with your daily autumn intention: Today, I let go of….. and I welcome….

Remind yourself that the change of season is a letting go of the old and an invitation for the new to unfold. Every day, set the intention to let go of something small and invite something new into your life.

Here are some examples – take it and make it your own:

I let go of hurrying and I welcome slowing down

I let go of being stuck and I welcome growth

I let go of old clothes and I welcome new ones

Which rituals are you going to adopt?

What is your daily intention for today?

Write me back. Would love to hear from you.

Do more:

1. Spend time together – just the two of you. If you feel that there is never enough time to do everything you want to do, you are right: there is never enough time unless you make the time. It’s very simple. If you get caught up with work, kids and other responsibilities, you’re choosing to place your relationships at the end of your list. Schedule time in your calendar (after consulting with your spouse of course) for fun time together. Sit together and agree on the best way for the two of you: blocking time in your calendars twice a week? Getting a sitter every Saturday night? Book tickets for movies and shows in advance? Plan a romantic vacation? Don’t make your spouse do it (especially if you’re a woman…). See how both of you can make it work. Share with them why this is important for you.
2. PBS – Pause, Breath, Smile. When you’ve finally made the time to be together, use one of my favorite “Be in the moment” techniques: create a relaxed, in-the-moment space where you connect, your share and you feel. How do you transition the from craziness of life to an effortless being in the moment? By “PBSing”. You pause (gives you time to step back and observe), you breath (helps you to automatically connect to the moment) and smile (helps you to change your posture, your attitude and release tension).
3. Be loving and intimate. Remember how it was when you first met? How about reliving it today? Give affection to your partner instead of expecting them to give first. Hug. Kiss. Touch. Greet them when they come home. Smile at them. Cuddle in bed together. Be the first one!
4. Communicate. Whatever it is: talk about it. Whenever you can: ask questions. Do you resent your partner for something? Share how you feel and ask him – with lots of curiosity – what happened? Share your feelings instead of blaming or criticizing them.  Always think before you talk: how can I phrase it as a question so they don’t feel attacked? Here are some examples of questions:

• I’m curious to know how you felt after our conversation last night
• What went through your head when you said that?
• What are some ideas you have around…

And one more thing about communication – acknowledge them as much as you can. Especially if you’re planning a tough conversation; acknowledge them first and then ask lots of questions.

Do less:

1. Stop focusing on what they do that drives you crazy and focus on what you like about them. Who were they when you fell in love? What were their gifts and attributes? They are still the same person. Change you focus and you’ll see that.
2. Control and fix them. The only person you can control and fix is yourself. Stop controlling them and trying to fix them. Remember that when you point your finger towards somebody, blaming them for something they have done, there are three other fingers left pointing towards yourself. Most of the times, we tend to blame others instead of cleaning our side of the street. Look at your side. How can you fix it? Share with your partner what you are willing to change instead of demanding them to change their part.
3. Expect them to read your mind, understand your needs and know what you want.
4. Expect them to be perfect 100% of the times 24/7. Are you????

My only other advice to you is- allow yourself to take small steps. Look at the above list and prioritize what you want to start with, what you feel comfortable starting with. Choose one “more” item and one “less” item for this week. When it works, add other items.

Would you like me to hold you accountable?

Email me your personalized list and your commitment for this week.

Please write in the subject line: “My personalized do more – do less list” so I can easily find your email between the tons of emails I get every day. I promise to email you back within 24 hours and give your feedback.

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. … Stay hungry. Stay foolish.

— Steve Jobs, Stanford University commencement address, June 2005.

Last week I gave my husband an iPad for his birthday. When he opened the box, he had such a big smile on his face like he just got the most amazing diamond on earth (or a Ferrari). The look on his face did not only say “that’s a great device that will make my life much easier and more organized especially when I travel”. The look on his face also said: “any Apple device I hold in my hands carries within the power, inspiration and vision of an amazing leader – Steve Jobs”.

A few days later Job passed away, leaving behind a lot more than technology and devices. Leaving behind a legacy of inspiration and creative visioning.

When I read his words: stay hungry…stay foolish… I hear: believe in yourself! Don’t let opportunities pass! Dream big!

How can we all take his message and use it to empower ourselves? How can we stay hungry and foolish?

Maybe by asking ourselves every morning, before the start of new day – If I had no limitations and was really thinking big, what would I be hungry for today and how would I stay foolish?

To me, foolish means not being so serious, being light, fun, enjoying, in ease…

Hungry means – open my eyes wide, take a deep breath, be open for new opportunities, and joyfully live life to the fullest.

Steve Job counseled eager graduates to look in the mirror each morning and ask themselves whether or not they were living the life they wanted.

I know I do. I live the life I want and I help others live the life they want. It makes me so happy to watch people I coach transition from being confused or unfocused to truly living the life they wish. Personally, I’m good with the “stay hungry” part. I dream big, I think big and I help others do the same.

My personal challenge is the “stay foolish” part. I find myself often too serious, sometimes pushing too hard and not having enough fun.

Would love to help you live the life you want.

Write me back! What do you hear when you read the words: stay hungry…stay foolish…?

One morning last week, I realized that I was out of my favorite lipstick. I rushed to the store to find out that MY specific color, the color I’ve been using for years, was discontinued. Horrified, I asked the seller for an alternative, maybe the same color under another name. She said: “Unfortunately no. I can see that you’re upset. I suggest you complain through our website.” I was indeed upset. I couldn’t find my color, only two similar shades: one lighter, one darker. Still upset, I bought both.

To my surprise, I actually ended up loving both of them, and getting lots of compliments!

It made me think about change. Why was I attached to one color for so many years? Why did I resist the change when it inevitably happened? What can I learn from my lipstick troubles?

I realized that minor changes, like finding out my lipstick was discontinued, are a great way to practice and develop the skill to deal with more significant changes without suffering so much. Why do we fear change so much? Because we are attached to the way things are. This is a known cognitive bias called the status quo bias. We will hold on to the status quo even if a change might improve our situation. By exposing small, relatively painless attachments like my attachment to my lipstick, we can undo our irrational tendencies and be more prepared to deal with change.

Start with small changes and have fun with them:

• Change the color of your lipstick/aftershave
• Change  the soap you’re using
• Take a new route to work – and actually pay attention while you’re driving for once!
• Sleep on the other side of the bed
• Sit on the other side of the dining table
• Wear a new color

Making those changes will add a glow, a fresh feeling to your life. It might even create a sense of adventure and excitement. Break the routine.

What are 3 things that you are curious to change?

Let me know. Would love to hear from you!

I am always curious about leaders and how they balance work/life, and the journey that brought them to where they are. I believe we’re all leaders, either by default or by choice. If we want to improve ourselves as human beings, as leaders, we can get energized and inspired by other leaders like Steve Jobs.

The two most interesting facts I learned about Jobs:

1. Steve never graduated from college! He dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months.
2. He was fired form Apple (yes, from his own company) when he was 30 years old, 1 year after inventing the Macintosh computer.

This made me even more curious. I found very interesting and inspiring information when I read a commencement speech he gave in 2005 in Stanford.

His working-class parents spent all their saving on his college tuition. Six months after he started college, he did not see the value in it and dropped out. He had no way of knowing at the time that a calligraphy class he took outside of college after dropping out would be useful ten years later, when he was designing the first Macintosh computer. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If he hadn’t dropped out, he wouldn’t have taken this course and computers today might not have the typography they do.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward”, says Jobs in the commencement address, “you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”

At 30, Jobs was devastated when he was fired from Apple. He realized that he should continue to do what he loves so and acquired Pixar, the computer animation studio. He is credited as the executive producer of Toy Story, the first feature film made entirely using computer generated animation. Again – there was no way for him to know that being fired from Apple would make him connect to his creativity in a new way. He later returned to Apple, bringing his new creative attitude.

“Your work is going to fill a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.”

What I learned from Steve Jobs’ story is that you always have to live like today is the last day of your life. If today was your last day, would you want to do what you are doing right now?

Fear often keeps us stuck where we are. The universe provides us with opportunities. Do we  grab them or do we let them pass by?

If you get a kick in the butt, don’t stop believing in yourself. Start with what you love doing. Only do what you love. Don’t compromise. Find what out what it is.

Trust.

Believe in yourself.

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards.”

If you got inspired from Jobs’ story as much as I did, please write me back and share what inspired you.

Balanced Moments can be difficult to come by but there is a way to break the cycle…

This call will be about finding time for yourself when there is so much on your plate.

There will be time for your questions. You are encouraged to ask any question you have about living a balanced life. Ask and receive the support you need.

The call is offered twice.

Morning Call
Thursday September 22, 2011 from 6:30 – 7:00 am EST
This is your opportunity for a wake-up call. Get centered before you start your day.

Lunch Call
Friday September 23, 2011 from Noon – 12:30 pm EST
Not a morning person? Grab your lunch and take a break from life.

How do I move forward?

1. Sign up for one of the FREE calls by clicking HERE.
2. You will receive an email confirmation with the number to call.
3. Write down the date in your calendar.
4. Think about a balance question you would like to ask. Either bring the question to the call or email it to Michal before the call.
5. Share this information with your friends so they can too create balance in their lives!

Sign up NOW. Give yourself a gift of balance. In only 30 minutes you will feel inspired, empowered and energized and you will learn new tools that you can practice daily.

Balance doesn’t happen by itself.