by Shmuel+ on November 18, 2014
In the past, I was driven to be a high-achiever, always striving to create a successful and fulfilled life. Service was one of my most important values, but years of being in service taught me to take care of myself only when everybody else had been taken care of. The problem was that the more I gave to others, the less I gave to myself. I became unhappy and unhealthy, and knew inside that something had to change. It took me years of self-discovery and personal growth to learn the meaning of self-love. From all the years of hard work and discovery, I now have no doubt that self-love is the essence of healthy relationships with others.
Think about it for a minute: when you’re being hard on yourself, when you beat yourself up for something you haven’t done, or even something you have, when you look in the mirror and you don’t love the person you see, can you be as loving, kind, and compassionate as you want to be for others?
You cannot create healthy intimate or even social relationships that satisfy you unless you fall in love with yourself first.
We must ask ourselves, why is it so much easier ...
by Michal Spiegelman+ on October 27, 2014
My clients are always asking me how they can feel less overwhelmed. One client shared with me recently how she got frustrated with the basket of sheets sitting in her hallway, waiting to be folded. Every time she walked past the basket she’d think to herself, “I should fold those” and then she’d feel overwhelmed. She already had 100 other things on her to-do list! When I asked her how she normally deals with laundry, she shared that they actually have a system in place where every weekend her husband and her kids fold the laundry in order to share the load. She realized that even though they actually have a good system in place, she still obsesses about the basket. She decided that from now on she will leave the basket inside the laundry room and close the door, trusting in her family members and the system, and choosing to release responsibility over it.
What’s the secret to feel less overwhelmed?
Let’s look at the basket of laundry as a metaphor.
We as women tend to carry many hats. We are typically the family chauffeur, the laundress, and the house cleaner…in essence, “the chief cook and bottle washer.” Though we excel at ...
by Michal Spiegelman+ on September 27, 2014
It seems contrary to our natural thinking to contemplate “slowing down” when our calendars become fuller and fuller each day. We all have times in our life when we are busier than normal, and this is not the time to neglect the art of slowing down.
We have two trips planned in the next few weeks. Ever since the trips were set in my calendar, I’ve been trying to plan ahead and get organized early enough so my business, my home, my dog, and my life in general, are all being taken care of. While planning ahead is essential to a busy life, in the last few days, I feel like I’ve been speeding up to “get everything done.” The pace these last few days has made me think: Am I trying to make things too perfect? How are all the preparations affecting my stress level? Should I slow down a bit?
I learn the lessons I need to learn, dear readers, by writing and sharing my thoughts with you. It appears that it is the perfect time to remind myself (and you) to slow down, even when you feel like you shouldn’t.
Here are 10 ways to slow down when life speeds ...
by Michal Spiegelman+ on September 13, 2014
How do you present yourself to the world?
What is the core message that you communicate to the world?
What type of energy are you feeling from the world around you?
Not only does the universe hear your thoughts and words, it also picks up your energetic message and ensures that more of the same will be delivered to you. Positive energy attracts positive energy; negative energy attracts… more negative energy!
As children, we were like sponges, absorbing ideas and beliefs from our parents, society, teachers, media and more. Past experiences and our reaction to them are stored in our body, including negative emotions. Things happen in the present that trigger those memories, and our present reaction is often controlled by our past experiences.
Imagine that all your past experiences are condensed into a phrase or a statement that is written on an invisible flag that you carry with you everywhere you go.
Recently, I’ve been challenging women I work with to explore what is written on their invisible flag. Here is one example of what I discovered:
A few weeks ago I started working with Shannon. She is 65, feeling depressed, unfulfilled, and desperate. Her attitude toward life is “it will be over soon, why even ...